Ready? Ready (Marker fic)
by Rent-Fanfictions
Summary: An angst filled one shot I wrote awhile back... In this one, Mark also has HIV, and he and Roger go out together.. enjoy! Mark/Roger


They had always thought about it.

The horrifying day Mark had been diagnosed HIV+, the thought had always crossed their mind. He wasn't going to be the one to survive anymore. He would have an early expiration date, just like his soul mate did.

Days turned into weeks, which turned to months, then years as the pair lived on with their disease. They both had that invisible clock, counting down, slowly eating their lives away. They wouldn't be able to get married, or start a family, or buy a shitty fixer-upper in Santa Fe, and spend all day cuddling, and kissing, and being lazy, just because they could.

They wouldn't have the chance to grow into old men, playing chess in the park together, holding hands, watching their grandchildren grow up. They wouldn't be able to take long walks, and then rest for awhile, because they weren't the young people they used to be. None of that. All thanks to HIV.

Mark, deep down, was happy he wasn't going to outlive his friends. Everyone knew, once Roger died, Mark would have been lost. He loved the guitar player more than anyone else in the world, and he wouldn't have been able to move on. Maureen and Joanne were devastated when they found out, as was Collins. Roger took it the hardest, though.

He had blamed himself, over, and over, and over again. Mark kept trying to tell him it wasn't his fault, but Roger wouldn't have any of it. That's just who Roger was. That's who he would always be. He was born stubborn, and would die it too.

What a fitting topic to be on, death. As the two men lay in the hospital bed together, for the last time, the smaller blonde in the larger's lap, arms wrapped tightly around him, laughs, and memories shared, they are without a doubt, close to the end.

This time when they caught a cold, it went on for weeks. Its started with Mark. Roger had insisted on taking care of him, but had caught it himself. As the pair's conditioned worsened, they had checked in to higher care a month ago. The others had left flowers, given them tight, teary embraces, and kisses, as they sensed it was time. They would leave the lovers to one another.

"It's been… amazing, Mark…" started Roger, smiling, and holding his filmmaker close.

"D-don't you… fucking start.." whispered the albino in response, tears already welling in his eyes.

"R-remember… high school?" asked the musician, and smile coming across his pale face. Mark let out a weak, shaky laugh. It was a lot weaker than Roger remembered.

"I- r-remember you always s-saving me from getting my ass kicked…" whispered Mark. The tears were falling harder now.

"I re-remember the loft… living with Collins and Mo and Benny… I w-went to Santa Fe… and… A-Angel… and I missed you…" his voice cracked. Mark looked up at him, giving a smile, and kissing his neck.

"I missed you t-too…." he winced in pain. Roger looked at him fearfully. Mark just smiled again.

"I-it's o-okay Rog…. th-this just means… we- we're gonna be together again soon… but… we're gonna be better…" Roger laughed weakly.

"You really think there's gonna be a place for us?"

"I'd like to hope s-so… we… we can have a h-ouse in Santa Fe like you wanted… an- we can have a huge back yard… and… and horses… and we can spend all day in bed, and not have to get up for anybody… and we can hold hands every day… and we can get married… and nothing is gonna keep us apart… r-right Rog? n-nothings gonna take you awa-" Mark was silenced as he started coughing, the pain becoming slowly worse.

Roger rubbed his back gently. "That's right, M-arky…. yeah…" he whispered, feeling the numbing pain in his own limbs get stronger.

"You're the love of my life… I love you so much…" whispered Mark once more. Roger ran his fingers through Mark's hair, and the smaller blonde reached up, running his finger's through Roger's.

"I love you t-oo…. I wouldn't have wanted anyone else… you're the most important thing in my life…"

Mark let out a whimper. "Hurts…" he whispered. Roger held him as tight as possible, kissing his head.

"I know sweetie… I k-know…" he whined at his own pain as well.

"T-…. this is it? hu-huh Roggy?" he asked, Squeezing his boyfriend back just as tight.

"I'm a-fraid so…." he responded. Blue eyes met green for awhile. Everything flashed between. Memories, emotions, but mostly, and undying love for one another.

"I'm g-gonna… mi-miss you, asshole…" teased Mark, his visions blurring ever so slightly.

"Not as much… a-as i'm gonna m-iss you, b-bitch…"

"Rog?"

"Yeah?"

"I-im… scared…"

"Don't be…"

Roger smiled, and took Mark's face in his hands.

"Can I- get one more kiss?"

"Of course Marky…." he leaned down, kissing the blue eyed man deeply. He kissed him for all the times they fought. He kissed him for all the stupid stunts he pulled. He kissed him for all the times he never said goodbye. He kissed him one last time, for the day they did have to say it.

"You're the best…" whispered Mark. Roger smiled weakly, and as Mark snuggled into his arms, he heard his lover speak again. "Y-you… be good…"

"I will…. meet me on the other side, okay?" Mark snorted.

"I- ima… kick your ass… for m-aking me cry…"

Roger leaned down and kissed his head once more.

."…. Ready?" Mark asked. Roger took a deep breath.

"Ready."

They went into their favorite position. Mark weakly crawled on top of Roger, and rested his head against his chest, nuzzling the crook of his neck, and holding his hand tightly. Roger smiled, stroking Mark's hair, and kissing his blonde tufts for the last time.

After one more "I love you" they let out a deep breath. Roger held Mark close. Listening to Roger's fading heart beat, and listening to Mark's shallow breathing, they both slowly, and together, slipped away, until their hands went limp in each other's.


End file.
